Stuck in the valley while the mountain’s mad with spells tonight: primroses under snow on the path beneath my window. My foreign studies are over. I’m back in Davos, home on doctors’ orders with shadows in my lungs…
No more drunken lovers, no more dissipation in the eighteenth arrondissement. How could I leave you like this — laid low by this hunger, consumed by vulgar nature?
In your bedsit you told me I just wasn’t made for life here: too cold to let go in the realm of the senses. So I left a whole life beholden to modest joy and discipline and swooned to vulgar nature, consumed by vulgar nature...
Swooned to vulgar nature, consumed by vulgar nature...
The priest speaks to me now, knowing I’m a dying man lost and unmoored by the liberty I’d chosen. How could I be free and be bold and gaze toward the infinite and still lose to vulgar nature, consumed by vulgar nature…
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